Challenged Values

Been a while since I wrote.

Life's been busy. Life's been good - I guess it hasn't been bad either so that makes it good? School work has picked up. All the angst 2 months ago are now gone. Specialties are being practiced. A balance is found. Sometimes I am an extremely paranoid person and I let this get the best of me sometimes. Speaking of paranoia, I am still worrying about tomorrow. I just hope it all goes well. I don't want 3 hours to go to waste. PLEASE SHOW UP!

Recently, something happened and has shaken me to my core. The last thing you want is for a loved one to tell you to not believe in your dream. Growing up in a family of such traditional and narrow minded values, it's hard to break through. I am not trying to defy these values, I'm simply embracing them in my own ways. Since 15 I have had this dream. It is for this goal that I have worked so hard for. There is a fear that I am going to be changed and transformed into an unrecognizeable person through the harsh reality of this world. Expressing this to a loved one was difficult. I expected support, however all I received was the complete opposite.

I do not believe I need to change.

However, when someone you love more than the world denies your dream, doesn't even take one second to acknowledge it, and just crushes it, it hurts.

You will never understand.

I have given up explaining to you.

You've shown me light, but may have also pushed me into darkness.

Daniel